Sunday, July 10, 2011

Trying to Move Forward

Life has been really sad and chaotic, these last several months/more than a year. Starting with Alysia's death in April 2010 (which is so unreal to write, I can't believe it still), followed by my mother's passing in November, my aunt in February and my dad on the 1st of May. My head spins, and I am so overwhelmed by the emotions that I can barely think at times.

At other times, life just moves on. Aliana has moved from 6th to 7th grade, we are dear friends with Alysia's partner Katherine, and my little nuclear-type family seems to be holding together, something I have worried about. Until today, every time I tried to write, I would just begin to cry. And then I couldn't go forward.

A couple of days ago, I was talking with my sister Fran, who encouraged me to write from Hawaii, where I am now. Just write weather reports, if you can, she said. It will open up another channel. And so I am sitting here in our apartment in Kauai, uploading photos to Facebook and thought I would try to just post something to move my mother's photo out of the top spot.

Paul and Danna and Dakota will be coming on Wednesday, and we'll be together here for 10 days or so, then Joy and I get 4 days just the 2 of us. Yay! Anyway, the weather is good, cloudy but warm and humid. We got here Saturday, I've been swimming twice with Aliana in the ocean, and tried body-surfing a couple of the larger waves. Now we're off to dinner.

3 comments:

  1. Dear You're so far away but you're not,

    Keep writing!! You are good at it and
    once you get back to it on a regular basis, you
    will know it has a purpose in your healing.

    After my loss, I couldn't write either but once
    I found my voice, I didn't stop. I want that for
    you.

    Give that family my love and keep some
    for yourself. Hope to see you when you get home!
    Kittie

    ReplyDelete
  2. good to see you back! yes, please - write about the weather! what a great idea!

    and i look forward to reading about the weather!

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